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    TEACHER: John, how do you spell "crocodile"?
    JOHN : "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
    TEACHER: No, that's wrong
    JOHN : Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!

    TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?
    TEACHER: What are you talking about?
    SARAH : Yesterday you said it's H to O!

    TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America.
    GEORGE : Here it is!
    TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
    CLASS : George!

    TEACHER: Willy, name one important thing we have today that we didn'thave ten years ago.
    WILLY : Me!

    TEACHER: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
    TOMMY : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

    TEACHER: Why are you late?
    WEBSTER: Because of the sign.
    TEACHER: What sign?
    WEBSTER: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."

    SILVIA: Dad, can you write in the dark?
    FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write?
    SYLVIA: Your name on this report card.

    TEACHER: In this box, I have a 10-foot snake.
    SAMMY : You can't fool me, Teacher... snakes don't have feet.

    TEACHER: How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?
    JOSE : Don't bite any.

    TEACHER: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I".
    ELLEN : I is...
    TEACHER: No, Ellen. Always say, "I am."
    ELLEN : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

    MOTHER: Why on earth did you swallow the money I gave you?
    JUNIOR: You said it was my lunch money.

    TEACHER: If I had seven oranges in one hand and eight oranges in the other what would I have?
    CLASS COMEDIAN: Big hands!



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