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  1. #1
    dR Contributor
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    Mar 2008

    Talking Things You Don't Want to Hear During Surgery

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    Things You Don't Want to Hear During Surgery:


    Has anyone seen my watch?

    That was some party last night. I can't remember when

    I've been that drunk.

    Damn! Page 47 of the manual is missing!

    Well this book doesn't say that... What edition is your

    OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.

    Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.

    Come back with that! Bad Dog!

    Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?

    Hand me that...uh... that uh.....thingy

    If I can just remember how they did this on ER last week.

    Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?

    Damn, there go the lights again...

    Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Hell, the guy's got two of 'em.

    Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!

    Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off.

    I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses.

    Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.

    Steril, shcmeril. The floor's clean, right?

    What do you mean he wasn't in for a sex change!

    What do you mean, he's not insured?

    This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?

    Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?

    Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.

    What do you mean "You want a divorce"!

    I don't know what it is, but hurry up and pack it in ice.

    Let's hurry, I don't want to miss "Bay Watch"

    That laughing gas stuff is pretty cool. Can I have some more of that?

    Hey Charlie, unzip the bag on that one, he's still moving.

    Did the doctor know he would look like that afterwards?

    Of course I've performed this operation before, Nurse!

    FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!



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