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    Dec 2009


    Default How long to worry about kids?-

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    How long to worry about kids?- Every one should Read


    Is there an imaginary cutoff period when
    Offspring become accountable
    for their own actions?
    Is there some wonderful moment when
    parents can become detached spectators in
    the lives of their children and shrug,
    'It's Their life,' and feel nothing?

    When I was in my twenties,
    I stood in a hospital corridor
    waiting for doctors to put a few stitches
    in my daughter's head and I asked,
    'When do you stop worrying?'
    The nurse said,
    'When they get out of the accident stage..'
    My Parents just smiled faintly
    and said nothing.

    When I was in my thirties,
    I sat on a little chair in a classroom
    and heard how one of my children
    talked incessantly, disrupted the class,
    and was headed for a career
    making license plates.
    As if to read my mind, a teacher said,
    'Don't worry, they all go through this stage
    and then you can sit back,
    relax and enjoy them.'
    My Parents just smiled faintly
    and said nothing.

    When I was in my forties,
    I spent a lifetime waiting
    for the phone to ring,
    the cars to come home,
    the front door to open.
    A friend said,
    'They're trying to find themselves.
    'Don't worry!
    In a few years, they'll be adults.
    'They'll be off on their own
    they'll be out of your hair'
    My Parents just smiled faintly
    And said nothing.

    By the time I was 50,
    I was sick & tired of being vulnerable.
    I was still worrying over my children,
    but there was a new wrinkle..
    Even though they were on their own
    I continued to anguish over their failures,
    be tormented by their frustrations and
    absorbed in their disappointments..
    and there was nothing I could do about it.
    My Parents just smiled faintly
    and said nothing.

    My friends said that
    when my kids got married
    I could stop worrying
    and lead my own life.
    I wanted to believe that,
    but I was haunted by my parent's warm smiles
    and their occasional,
    'You look pale. Are you all right' ?
    'Call me the minute you get home'.
    Are you depressed about something?'

    My friends said that
    when I became a grandparent
    that I would get to enjoy
    the happy little voices yelling
    Grandma! Papa!
    But now I find that I worry
    just as much about the little kids
    as the big ones.
    How can anyone cope
    with all this Worry?

    Can it be that parents are sentenced
    to a lifetime of worry?
    Is concern for one another
    handed down like a torch
    to blaze the trail of human frailties
    and the fears of the unknown?
    Is concern a curse or is it
    a virtue that elevates us
    to the highest form of earthly creation?

    Recently, one of my own children
    became quite irritable, saying to me,
    'Where were you?
    I've been calling for 3 days,
    and no one answered
    I was worried.'
    I smiled a warm smile.
    The torch has been passed on.!!
    ...being a human...



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