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    Chitkabrey is marketing itself as "a bold move to make the boldest movie by a bold director who is bold." Or something like that. Translation: this is semi-porn with a story and a pledge to titillate. Never mind that it is Ravi Kishan who is most exposed of all. And that there is little story.

    This is a 'concept'-driven film, which means that the writer/director had a germ of an idea and completely failed to translate it into a 120-minute film that holds your attention. Or make any sense. It's all so surreal: a reunion between college batchmates takes place 15 years after they've graduated.

    They don't know who's hosting, but they don't care. They drink away until they're locked in a room, and guided by a voice from an audio speaker, are asked to divulge their deepest secrets to each other. They don't want to of course, but the waiters have guns.

    Their wives also have to re-live situations thzey forced upon others in college. One of them coerced a girl to suck on a pen asking her to imagine it to be his and now his wife has to suck on a stick. Of ice-cream. Things like that.

    The voice turns out to be a psychotic Ravi K who was also part of the class but not of the group. He was tortured and ragged by these very men and women whom he had warned of the seven deadly sins (that his mother told him about). Now he wants revenge and money. The wives are sent out to collect the cash but are found wanting despite the fact that they're politicians, only talk about 'contracts' all the time, and drive around in Mercedes'.

    Again, this could've made for a gripping film and we've seen many Hollywood thrillers played out in the confines of a single house or a handful of locations. however, makes a mockery out of the genre.

    Ravi Kishan towers over the non-actors (and he is good, no doubt) but even Pacino and De Niro would be gasping for breath, and flailing their arms given such abysmal directions.

    On the positive side, there are several images in the film that will stay with you for a long, long time including (but not restricted to): Ravi Kishan being forced-stripped (entirely). A sardar having semi-porn-like sex outside a farmhouse (also spotted by wife).

    A sleazy broker who starts exercising in happiness after being promised sex as bribe later in the evening (in those very words).

    An explicit hotel room massage that turns into a threesome. Dialogue that goes, "What do you think of my balls?" (said by a woman, no less!). And a phone call from America by a totally random and irrelevant character shot in a photo studio (a print of a blurry Brooklyn bridge in the background). Yes these are all memorable. Scars are memorable, right?



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